The Thinker and Feeler: Finding Relationship Balance

relationship balance

Taking a personality test in relationships could be what saves it during rough times. It does not give someone a pass if they are in the wrong, but it brings clarity to both parties. Your personality type helps explain how you live life. Though it doesn’t explain the role of upbringing, it helps shed light why, because of it, you turned out as you did.

Relationship Balance

One factor that dominates relationships is who is logical and who is irrational. Men tend to get the former title, while women are labeled as falling into the latter. How accurate are these charges against both sexes.

Thinking vs. Feeling

The Thinking types are represented as T, and the Feeling as F. What they show is how people make decisions. One calls for objectivity; looking at the facts and drawing a logical conclusion. The latter is subjective, with emotion being a driving force to decision making. From societal narratives, women are socialized to be feelers and men thinkers, making the categorization accurate for the most part.

It, therefore, makes much sense why frustration and hurt are the conclusions of almost every argument gone wrong. The thinker is frustrated at the feelers inability to accept facts as they are, and the feeler is hurt because of the cold delivery without much thought to their emotional reaction.

What thinkers frequently get accused off is their lack of tack in delivering less than pleasing information. It is why pop culture insists on men never to use “yes” to answer a question a woman has asked about their insecurity. They also tend to notice flaws more, as they sieve information as it comes with no filters. For that reason, they tend to be problem solvers. It is not that they don’t feel, it is just they opt to move past it and do something about it.

Feelers, on the other hand, focus more on values and principles in decision making, both based from the heart. They aim to create a happy balance and are thus affected more by conflict. For them it is a matter of empathy but can also be very passionate when arguing, going to levels that a thinker thinks is unwarranted. At the moment, the situation and the feelings are what drive them,

Finding The Balance

Knowing where you fall makes you more mindful of your partner. Being on one extreme is problematic. Therefore both should aim to inch closer to the middle to find balance.